In my perusal of the Pringle's chipcapades, I came across another Penn State masturbation incident. Spencer Ridenhour played Safety for the Nittany Lions. He transferred to UMass. But he took a few cans of Pringles with him to uncork at UMass.
It is obviously time for internet investigative hero, Carl Monday to invade the land of JoPa. Carl Monday is a Cleveland television reporter. He's seems about 1/4 as entertaining as our good friend Bill Bonds. But, Carl is the right man to break this masturbation ring in Happy Valley. Carl is renowned for busting Buckeye Michael Cooper, Cleveland's most famous masturbator:
But Carl Monday, didn't leave it there. He buried Buckeye Michael Cooper:
I see visions of trenchcoats at the Pattee!